1 Thought That Will Kill Your Job Search
If you’re trying to figure out what you want to do next in your career…
Especially if you’re “burning the boats ⛵️🔥” and thinking of doing something different than what you’ve been doing so far…
Here’s the 1 thought that will totally kill your job search and exploration process.
The thought is: “I don’t know what I’m doing.”
This is not an objective truth (even though it may feel very true).
This is a loaded gun of a thought that instantly creates an emotion for you.
Here are some of the emotions this thought can create for people:
Defeated
Confused
Overwhelmed
Frantic
Stressed
And from that feeling, here’s what people usually do:
You create complex plans. Your brain comes up with a big list of ALL the things you have to do. And oof. It seems pretty hard. You either attack the plan frantically (but ineffectively) or don’t start at all.
You see things as Should’s, not Want’s. You lose touch with the reason why you wanted to do this in the first place. All the tasks seem like heavy homework assignments.
You want a guarantee of success before you get started. You need to be SURE that the process or decision or next step is RIGHT before you do anything. You spend a lot of time thinking and researching — and not much time DOING.
The unknown looks very scary. You retreat backward into what you know (even if you’re not that excited about it).
Rejection and failure feel personal. If something goes wrong or someone says no to you, it feels like an indictment of who you are.
This is the MODE that “I don’t know what I’m doing” puts you in.
And this is why your thoughts are so vitally important.
Thoughts are not just cute little sentences floating around in your brain.
Every thought creates an emotion, and every emotion DRIVES certain actions and simultaneously BLOCKS other actions.
When you’re driven to do certain things and simultaneously blocked from doing other things, you enter a certain mode.
And whatever mode you’re in keeps reinforcing itself and seeming more and more like the “real truth.”
Just look at everything you do when you’re in this mode!
If you spend all your time making complex plans, dreading doing them, researching instead of doing, avoiding the unknown, and running from rejection…
Emotionally — it feels like crap.
Tactically — you’re not going to figure it out.
Mentally — you’re going to become more and more convinced that you don’t know what you’re doing.
It’s 100% normal to slip into this mode. I slip into it multiple times a day without noticing!
But you need to notice that you’re in it and then…
You need to think: “I know exactly what I’m doing.”
When you believe that, it creates an emotion like:
Authority
Clarity
Ease
Certainty
Playfulness
And from that feeling, here’s what people usually do:
You create simple, easy plans. The answer just floats up in front of you. “Of course! I just have to do XYZ.”
You see things as Want’s, not Should’s. You stay in touch with your original purpose for doing all this. Everything feels self-directed and fun — not like homework.
Rejection and failure make you curious. You’re like, “Huh, that didn’t work. I wonder why?”
You don’t need a guarantee of success. You have faith in YOU. You take a good-enough plan or decision or path, and you just get started. You know you’ll figure it out along the way.
The unknown looks interesting. You’re excited to learn new things and figure out things you don’t know.
This is what “I know what I’m doing” mode looks like.
And it’s very powerful.
It’s powerful because the emotions it creates are very sustainable. You can feel that way ALL DAY. It feels great!
It’s powerful because all those actions will lead to you figuring it out.
And it’s powerful because the longer you stay in this mode, the more you’ll build your own belief that you DO know what you’re doing.
So how do you actually BELIEVE “I know what I’m doing”? Here’s how to bridge the gap. 🌉
Find something you ALREADY believe you know how to do.
And apply that way of thinking to your job search.
For example—
If you think you’re a really good project manager. Great! The job search is now a project you have to manage. How would You the Project Manager approach this job search?
If you think you’re a good writer or artist. Great! The job search is now your creative project. How does You the Artist approach this job search?
If you think you’re an excellent business strategist. Great! The job search is now your strategy project. How does You the Strategist approach this job search?
If you think you’re really good at helping and advising others. Great! Imagine that you’re doing this whole job search for someone else. How does You the Helper & Adviser approach this job search?
You already have areas where you feel like the expert.
Just tap into that mode and then bring it over here, to the job search.
And once you know how to bridge the gap, all you need to do is build the habit. 💪🏽
Habit-building is very simple. You just need is a cue, a routine, and a reward.
Set up your cue. How will you notice that you’ve slipped into “I don’t know what I’m doing” mode? Perhaps when you notice yourself procrastinating? Or when you feel that pit of dread in your stomach?
Set up your routine. What will you do when you notice that cue? It can be as simple as saying, “Pause! How would Me the [Thing I’m Good At] handle this situation?” Whatever it is, make sure it creates the feeling you want to tap into.
Savor how good it feels. Before you jump in, take a few seconds to notice how good it feels to be clear, authoritative, playful, and to want to GET MOVING. Isn’t this great? These few seconds of savoring and celebration are the mental reward that help lock in this habit loop.
You don’t need your brain to stay in “I know what I’m doing” mode permanently. That’s not even possible! You’re going to slip out of it all the time.
All you need to do is to set up this simple habit loop so that you notice when you’ve slipped out of the mode you want to be in, and you rebound quickly and easily each time.
That’s it. I gave you the whole secret.
This is the exact process I use when I work with my clients. Four simple steps.
Whatever the problem is, we always work through:
Step 1: What mode are you in right now? What are you thinking and feeling that is unintentionally blocking you from solving this problem?
Step 2: What mode do you want to be in? How do you have to think and feel in order to solve this problem simply and easily?
Step 3: How can you bridge the gap and actually believe the thoughts that will get you into that mode? We’re not in the business of repeating affirmations. New thoughts don’t work unless you believe them.
Step 4: How will you build the habit of snapping back into that mode again and again when your brain wants to go in a different direction? It’s not a one-time fix. It’s a daily practice — just like any habit.
Current thinking. New thinking. Bridge the gap. Build the habit. That’s it.
You just experienced it right here in this email.
How great would it be to have even more of this — custom-tailored to your brain and your life?
You can do this on your own. I know you’re more than smart enough to figure it out.
And…it’s WAY easier, faster, and more effective if you bring in an expert and let them do the heavy lifting.
It’s like the difference between spending years in the gym, trying things out on your own, learning about fitness and nutrition from scratch…
Versus hiring a trainer who can tell you exactly what to do and tailor it to your needs in just a few weeks.
Don’t put yourself on the slower, harder, solo path.
Not when this can be so easy — when all you have to do is show up to a call once a week, dump your brain out, and let me guide you and your brain through this process step by step.
Doesn’t that sound fun?
Don’t wait another day.
PS: Even if you’re not looking for a new job right now, these two modes happen during your work day too!
“I don’t know what I’m doing” mode is the essence of imposter syndrome.
And the fix is the same.
You don’t need more experience.
You don’t need positive feedback from others.
You don’t need to prepare more for that meeting.
You don’t need everything to go exactly right.
All you need to do is learn how to tap into “I know exactly what I’m doing” mode and then build the habit of doing it again and again and again — no matter what’s going on around you.
Come talk to me and let me teach you how.
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