Good Student Mentality vs. Con Man Mentality (Part 3)
I have been loving telling you to be a little more like a Con Man and a little less like a Good Student in this series.
I’m not telling you to go commit frauds.
But I am telling you to get a little more playful and scrappy with it :)
Here’s the third way that Good Students and Con Men differ.
(Go check out part 1 and part 2 as well if you haven’t already.)
Good Students wait for permission.
Con Men show people what’s possible.
In the first episode of White Collar, Neal Caffrey (the con man) is put in prison for one of his crimes, and then he negotiates a deal where he can serve out his prison sentence on the outside (with an ankle monitor) if he helps the FBI solve cases.
Neal’s excitement to leave prison quickly turns to dismay when he sees the crappy motel he’s now going to be living in.
Peter Burke, the FBI agent, informs Neal that it cost $700 a month to house him inside prison, so it’s going to cost $700 a month to house him outside of prison, and this is the best he can do with $700 ⬇️
Neal then goes to a thrift store to buy new clothes, strikes up a conversation with a wealthy older woman donating her late husband’s suits…
And before you know it, he’s talked his way into into renting the upstairs guest suite in her apartment for $700 a month.
And suddenly, he’s living here ⬇️
When Peter finds out, he is furious.
Everything Neal did was technically within the rules — he’s within his budget and within the radius required by his ankle monitor.
But… Someone just out of prison… With a $700/month rent budget… Living here??
It seems impossible. It seems unfair!
It seems like a Judo-flip on “the rules.” And who is he to do that??
This is what it looks like when you show people what’s possible instead of asking for permission.
Too often, Good Students assume that other people know best.
Especially people in positions of authority. (They’re so knowledgeable and experienced!)
That’s why Good Students go around asking for permission before doing things.
Good Students don’t trust themselves — their instincts, their vision, their ability to create, from thin air, something that no one has ever seen before.
Con Men know that nobody knows anything.
Least of all people in positions of authority. (They’re often the least creative and visionary of all.)
That’s why Con Men consult themselves first.
Before asking anyone else, “What do you think? What should I do? What’s the best next step?”
They ask themselves: “What do I think? What do I want? What’s my vision? What do I think is possible?”
Con Men trust themselves.
Where are you waiting for permission?
I can jump in and offer my opinion…once I have more experience.
I have an idea for a startup…but I don’t see any company offering anything like this.
I can start dancing on the dance floor…if someone else goes first.
And how can you show people what’s possible instead?
I think I have something of value to say…so let me jump in and offer my opinion.
Dammit, I think people need this product…so let me get out there and offer it.
I know once one person starts dancing, everyone will join in…so let me be the first and get the party started :)
You already know what’s possible.
That little voice in your head — that little whisper in your soul — already knows what you really, really want.
It already sees the vision.
You don’t need anyone else to give you permission.
You just need a little nudge to give yourself the permission to do what you really want.
One nudge to get started.
Another few nudges to keep you going.
A big hug and then another nudge when it gets hard.
All the way until you get to the end and discover that you’ve become the person you want to be.
You can find that regular stream of nudges in my course & coaching program: Less Stress, More Flow, opening soon.
Join the waitlist today :)
What my clients have to say…
“It’s honestly fun.
You’re working on the most important thing in your life – your goals and your aspirations.
And you’re doing it in a manner that is not harsh or strict. In fact, it’s quite fun.
It’s like a video game, and you get to gently make progress towards the things that matter.”
—Client | Solutions Engineer at Fintech Company
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