How to Demonstrate Competence in a Job Interview

Here’s how I notice most people tend to answer job interview questions:

They either think of it like filling out a “standard interview rubric”…

“You have to have:

• A story about resolving a conflict

• A story about managing ambiguity

• A story about learning from failure

• A story about successfully delivering results

Have I picked the right stories for each of those? Am I telling them in the right way?”

Or they think of it as an arena where they have to prove they’ve already done the exact thing they’re being interviewed for.

“Oh crap, I can’t point to a time when I did [the exact thing I’ll have to do in this job] or delivered [the exact outcome I’ll have to deliver in this role].

Uhh… That’s not good. What kind-of-analogous examples can I cobble together so I can make a case for why they should hire me?”

Let me give you another way of thinking about it.

First, understand the question under the question.

If someone asks you, “Tell me about a time you resolved a difficult conflict”…

What are they really asking you?

WHY are they asking this question? What are they trying to figure out?

Are they asking because the main issue right now is cross-functional disagreement, and they need someone who can help Product and Legal and Tech all speak the same language and work together effectively?

Are they asking because the prioritization process in their company is full of sharp elbows and big egos, and they’re looking for someone who will push their team’s agenda without backing down?

Are they asking because the leader two levels up is short-tempered and reactive, and the team spends half their time dealing with their requests and calming them down?

Don’t just trot out your standard response and hope you nail the landing.

Prioritize live presence over rigid preparation.

Understand the question under the question.

Figure out what they’re really trying to find out about you, and WHY.

Then, explain your philosophy and process…

Before you jump into your story, take a moment to explain how you approach problems like this.

What’s your philosophy — aka the principles and beliefs you use to guide your problem-solving?

And what’s your process — aka how you translate that philosophy into concrete action steps that get you from A to B?

For example, if someone asked me how I resolve conflicts, I might say…

My philosophy is:

• People don’t want things. People want feelings. They may come to you asking for things, but it’s always because they believe getting that thing will create a feeling for them.

The conflict resolution process that this translates into is:

• I listen. I ask a lot of questions. I try to understand what the other person really wants.

• I look for win-win solutions where we both get the feelings we want, even if we don’t get the specific things we initially asked for.

This is just an off-the-cuff answer, but you get what I mean.

Rather than telling a story about a time I resolved a conflict, I’m explaining how I approach, break down, and solve this type of problem.

Which is the real thing they’re getting at and the real thing that will create value for this company.

…as well as drawing the connection to your past experiences.

Once you’ve explained your philosophy and process, the next natural question is: Well, does that work? Are you good at doing that?

Which is the perfect time to bring in examples and stories.

NOT to demonstrate how you’ve already done the exact things this job requires you to do.

But to bring your philosophy and process to life with real examples.

To demonstrate HOW and WHY your approach to solving this kind of problem is effective.

And to explain how the things you’ve done in the past have honed the exact skillset you’re going to apply in this role.

As you prepare, regularly reverse the roles.

As you start fleshing out your answers, you’re going to be tempted to ask someone: What do you think? Is this what I should say?

Before you ask others, test each answer by reversing the roles.

If you were hiring for this role, what would you think if the candidate gave your answer?

What would you think of them? What further questions would you have? What would you want to clarify or check up on?

Keep asking yourself this question again and again as you build out your answers.

Don’t stop until your response is, “Hell yeah, I’d hire that person on the spot.”

See yourself as an advisor, not a job candidate.

The goal here is not to hype yourself into thinking you’re perfect for every role.

The goal is to make a measured, accurate assessment of how well a particular role fits you.

But it’s very hard to make that kind of assessment when you feel like you’re standing in the spotlight, auditioning for a role while everyone else silently judges you.

So stop auditioning.

Imagine if you were a strategic advisor hired by this team.

They explain to you what their current state is, where they’re trying to go, why they’ve been having trouble getting there, and what they’ve done so far to close they gap.

They tell you their “answer to the case” — the kind of person they think they should hire, and what they think that person should do all day long.

But you don’t just take their word for it.

You get the FACTS and make your own assessment.

You can do this during a job interview too.

The job description is just their answer to the case — their assessment of the problem, the solution, and the kind of person that can get them there.

Get the facts and then ask yourself:

What do you think they really need?

What do you think this role will actually end up turning into?

And does that sound like something you’d enjoy and be good at?

If you want some help doing everything I just described…

If you’re wondering…

• How do I actually figure out the question under the question?

• What IS my philosophy and process? What if I don’t have one?? (Spoiler alert: You do. We just need to extract and articulate what’s already there.)

• What if my past experiences aren’t that related? How do I still make the case for myself?

• What if I’m NOT convinced by my own answers?

• What if the stakes are high and I really want this job — how the heck do I beat my nerves and stay in Advisor Mode?

I can’t give you all those answers in an email.

But I can if we work together.

We’ll work through those questions one by one.

You’ll develop your answers — custom-made for your situation.

You’ll go out there and practice, and then come back to analyze what happened, assess, and adjust.

You’ll learn how to weather the storm of dings and rejections — to give yourself a hug and keep on going.

And you’ll get this done :)

So let’s start today.

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What my clients have to say…

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I still use it to this day. I'll just open up a Google Doc and I'll go through: old thought, new thought, how it makes me feel.

And it's just such a logical way of looking at things.”

—Client | Solutions Engineer at Fintech Company

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