How to think about tradeoffs
Here’s the biggest mistake I see people make when it comes to tradeoffs.
They assume from the beginning that tradeoffs are necessary.
And then they start making tradeoffs right out of the gate.
These could be things like…
“Here’s everything I want in my next job…but no job is perfect, so let me apply to jobs that don’t have everything I want.”
“I wish I could have a fulfilling career AND make as much money as I want to make…but you can’t have everything, so let me just resign myself to my current career path.”
“This is everything I’m looking for in a partner…but nobody is perfect, so let me cross some of those things off the list preemptively.”
I’m not saying that tradeoffs are NEVER needed — of course, you need to make tradeoffs sometimes!
But STARTING from the position of “I have to make tradeoffs” guarantees that you’ll make tradeoffs.
Because you’re not even giving yourself a chance to explore the alternate possibility — What if you DON’T have to make any tradeoffs?
So here’s how I want you to think about tradeoffs.
Start by asking…
How can I do this with zero tradeoffs?
How can I get everything I want?
“Here’s everything I want in my next job…and let me start out by only applying to jobs that meet those criteria.”
“I wish I could have a fulfilling career AND make as much money as I want to make…so let me start figuring out how that could be possible.”
“This is everything I’m looking for in a partner…so let me start out by only meeting up with people who have all those characteristics.”
If you’re going to make a tradeoff, I want you to make it based on data and experience, not fear and guesswork.
Try to get your 100% A++ outcome first.
Point your intelligence and creativity and work ethic at the question:
How can I get everything I want?
NOT at the question:
How can I reconcile myself to not getting everything I want?
Give yourself a robust timeline and high number of reps to really figure out how to have it all.
And, if at the end of your timeline and your reps, you’ve found out through data and experience that your 100% A++ outcome isn’t possible…
THEN you can drop down to your Plan B and make a tradeoff.
But don’t start making them right out of the gate.
That’s just giving up before you even begin.
This email is inspired by multiple conversations I’ve had with clients recently, and here’s the most interesting thing about those conversations…
My clients didn’t even realize they were doing this until I pointed it out.
They didn’t realize they were actively choosing to make tradeoffs before they needed to…
They thought statements like “No job is perfect” and “You can’t have everything you want” were just objective truths that they had to resign themselves to.
This is the value of a coach — they can show you your blindspots.
And if you aren’t living the exact life you want to be living…
And if you’re feeling confused or defeated or about how create the life you want…
I guarantee that you have blind spots.
It’s not that it’s not possible or that you’re not capable of having the life you want.
You just don’t know yet WHY you’re not creating it today and HOW to create it going forward.
Let me show you how.
What my clients have to say…
“My general happiness levels are higher. I have coping mechanisms during stress. My husband is seeing the results of it — I have a better married life with him.
Coaching has given me more inner peace and focus as to what are the things that I want and how to go after them without setting ceilings. And it’s allowed me to get to the root of what it is that I want, and not just chase the next big thing.”
—Client | CEO, PE-backed company
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