One unhinged question to help you get clear on your next career step
Don’t get mad at me for this one 🫢
Many high achievers start thinking about what’s next in their career because something isn’t working where they are.
You’re feeling enough stress and anxiety day to day that you’re starting to burn out…
You’re not sure if you want to be on this path anymore, and the existential question of what to do with your life is weighing on your soul…
You feel stuck where you are, and you want to feel like you’re moving forward, not stagnating in place…
Basically, something feels bad about where you are right now.
And when something feels bad…
Your brain — newsflash — tends to prioritize feeling better.
Which means, as your brain considers possible next steps…
It’s probably evaluating each option by asking:
Would doing this make me feel better than what I’m doing right now?
This is not a bad way to evaluate your possible next steps.
But let me throw an unhinged question into the mix :)
If your goal wasn’t to feel better…
What would your goal be?
If I told you that you would be feeling roughly the same way you feel right now…
No matter what you did next…
What would you do next?
What would you prioritize?
What would you be solving for?
If you weren’t solving for feeling better?
I’m not saying that feeling better doesn’t matter.
It absolutely DOES matter.
I’m just saying that “feeling better” is a tricky north star to guide your decision making.
Here’s why.
It’s for two seemingly diametrically opposed reasons :)
One — How you feel varies day to day, even hour to hour.
If you try to decide what to do next based on how you’re feeling right now…
That’s like trying to follow a compass that spins around every 15 minutes.
You come out of a great meeting, and you’re like, “I crushed it. Maybe I CAN climb the ladder here.”
Then you run into a tricky roadblock, and you’re like, “Screw this, I need to find a new job.”
Then you try to update your resume, and you’re like, “Have I even done anything impressive? Never mind, I should just stay here.”
Then you have to do some tedious admin caused by corporate bureaucracy, and you’re like, “What is the point of anything? Capitalism is a scam.”
And then you hear from someone who was genuinely helped by some work you did, and you’re like, “Wow, I AM making a difference. My work matters.”
You can easily experience all five of these in a single work day.
And if your brain is using “feeling better” as its north star as it tries to figure out what your next step should be…
You’re going to feel very confused by the end of that day.
Two — How you feel on average tends to stay stable no matter what your circumstances.
Ironically, despite how much your emotions move around in a single day or week…
Your average emotional experience is quite stable over time, even if your circumstances change dramatically.
If you tend to be anxious and high-strung, with short bursts of feeling secure and happy…
You’re going to be anxious and high-strung, with short bursts of feeling secure and happy, no matter what job you’re in.
If you tend to be relaxed and happy-go-lucky with short bursts of intensity…
You’re going to be relaxed and happy-go-lucky with short bursts of intensity, no matter what job you’re in.
This is a psychological phenomenon known as the hedonic treadmill.
Studies have shown that even after life events as dramatic as winning the lottery or becoming paralyzed, people tend to return to their baseline level of happiness some time after the event.
And I’m sure you’ve experienced this yourself.
How many times have you achieved a major accomplishment or made a big change…
Only to find yourself feeling about the same as you always feel a few days or weeks later?
(The real way to change how you feel on average is to make internal changes to your habitual thought patterns and automatic reactions…
Not to make external changes and hope that they just magically make those internal changes happen on their own.
That’s about as effective as saying, “I hope winning the lottery makes me left-handed.”)
All of this is to say…
I definitely want you to feel better.
But “feeling better” is a slippery foundation on which to build your next career step.
Which is why I want you to ask yourself—
If my goal wasn’t to feel better… What would my goal be?
Because that question is going to reveal the stable strategic pillars that you want to build your next step around.
Maybe it’s things like…
A certain kind of work that you want to be doing.
A certain kind of impact you want to make, or problem you want to solve.
A certain industry you want to be in.
A certain way of working and teaming up with others.
A certain level of flexibility or time outside of work.
These are the goals, values, and preferences that matter to you no matter how you’re feeling.
They stay stable over time — regardless of whether you had a good day AND regardless of what your average emotional patterns tend to be.
These are a solid foundation on which to build your next career step.
I know that, no matter how you’re feeling day to day…
You want to be thoughtful and strategic about your next career step.
Whether it’s recommitting to where you are and making it work for you…
Or pulling the trigger on leaving, getting crystal clear on what to do next, and making that next step a reality…
The last thing you want to do is make a rushed, random, or emotional decision.
And you deserve an expert thought partner to help you decide on the best possible next step and make it happen.
Someone who can bring structure to the chaos and cut through the noise.
And leave you feeling clear, settled, and confidently on track.
So come talk to me, and let’s get you unstuck today.
What my clients have to say…
“Coaching helped me get up and feel empowered and feel like I could actually change my outcome based on how I thought about things.
Having been a real academic overachiever, I get into this situation where if things are not perfect, I get stuck in a rut. Unless it’s all perfect, I don’t move forward.
But Pooja taught me the concept of ‘quantity creates quality’ and gave me practical goals every week, and that really helped me move forward in my professional life (and even in my dating life!).
I moved from just sitting around in my room overthinking everything and not really taking any action, to having weekly appointments to move things forward, and having someone holding me accountable to getting stuff done. And that just gave me a lot more self-belief and structure.”
—Client | Communications Consultant turned Lawyer
I help high achievers who are feeling stressed or stuck in their career get clear on what's next.
Whether that’s recommitting to the path they’re on…
Or moving on to their next step.
If you’re feeling stressed or stuck where you are, and you’re not sure what to do next, check out my table of contents for more resources.
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