The Most Powerful Way to Rewire Your Brain: SHOW, Don't Tell
You know when you KNOW what you want to do…and you genuinely WANT to do it…but you’re just not doing it?
You want to speak up and give your contradictory opinion in a meeting…but in the moment, you’re filled with self-doubt and you stay silent.
You want to cut off that windbag who derails all your discussions…but you just can’t find the right time to jump in and interrupt him.
You wonder if maybe you don’t need to send out SUCH detailed notes after key meetings…but the thought of other people’s disappointment stops you from making changes.
You know that taking a break would help you recharge…but when break time comes, you always have a reason why you need to keep working
It can be very frustrating to KNOW the right answer but freeze up when it’s time to execute.
Here’s what I want you to do in those situations:
Of course, mentally reinforce why what you want to do is a really GOOD idea.
Why giving your contradictory opinion HELPS the team
Why interrupting that one person who won’t shut up is BEST for everyone — including that person
Why sending out a few bullets after key meetings might be BETTER than sending detailed notes
Why taking a break will help you get MORE done overall
But the mental side alone may not be enough to get you over the “fear hump” in the moment.
So I also want you to give yourself structured mini-reps to SHOW (not tell) your brain that what you want to do is SAFE and EFFECTIVE.
For example—
Pick 5 lower-stakes meetings and make a point of giving your contradictory opinion in every one. After each one, SHOW your brain—
See? No one was upset! People were very receptive to my ideas. And it moved the discussion in a really productive direction!
Set a goal to interrupt someone (anyone!) 5 times over the next week. SHOW your brain—
Oh wow, I don’t need to wait for the perfect moment. I can jump in and redirect anytime. And actually, the other person was completely receptive to going in a different direction!
If you have 5 big meetings coming up, plan to send detailed notes for 2 of them and shorter bullets for 3 of them. SHOW your brain—
Oh, most people didn’t say anything when I sent bullets instead of detailed notes. One person had a follow-up question, which I addressed easily. But everything was fine!
Schedule something with someone else for 5 breaks over the next two weeks — like a meal or call with a friend. Then SHOW your brain—
Yes, I REALLY didn’t want to get up from work… But the chat was so fun and so refreshing that I got a second wind afterwards and got more done. And no one noticed or cared that I stepped away for a bit.
Your automatic brain works SO HARD to protect you from (what it thinks are) dangerous situations.
It’s not trying to sabotage you or work you into the ground.
In these situations, it genuinely believes that not speaking up, not interrupting, over-working, and not taking breaks KEEPS YOU SAFE.
Which is why it throws up SUCH a big wall of resistance in the moment and makes it SO hard to change what you’re doing.
The answer isn’t to judge yourself, wonder what’s wrong with you, or get frustrated.
The answer is to SHOW (not tell) your automatic brain — in small, repeated, manageable doses — that what it THINKS is super dangerous is actually completely safe and effective.
Once your automatic brain has seen the evidence, the in-the-moment resistance will reduce significantly (or go away completely).
And then you’re home free to do the things you want.
And if you want some help…
Understanding WHAT exactly your brain is so afraid of
Building up the mental argument for why doing what you want will get BETTER results
Structuring mini-reps to SHOW your brain it’s safe
Following through on your reps (and troubleshooting if you don’t)
Then come work with me one-on-one…
…or join the waitlist for my 2023 course:
From Imposter to “I Got This.”
The High-Stress High Achiever’s step-by-step guide to:
- Eliminate work stress and imposter syndrome.
- Get clear + get moving on the next step in their careers.
- Create a life they love living.
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