7 Ways to Believe Something New (epilogue)
We’ve covered all seven ways to believe something new!
They were: (1) put it in your mental filter and find evidence everywhere, (2) find things that are going well and use them as reference points, (3) find the most damning piece of evidence and rewrite the story, (4) break down your brain’s logic chain, (5) reverse the roles, (6) zip line it, and (7) think like your future self.
So why have we been working so hard to build belief in a new perspective?
As you know, your thoughts — and nothing else — create your whole reality.
And so the key to living the life you want to be living is changing your thoughts.
But that’s not always as easy as just flipping a switch.
You can chant affirmations till the cows come home…
I love my job! I have plenty of time! I am worthy! I will achieve my dreams!
…but it doesn’t make a damn of a difference if you don’t actually believe it.
And what is belief?
Why do some thoughts “feel” true while others “feel” false? All thoughts are just perspectives! None of them are objectively true or false. So what’s happening when your brain throws one thought away immediately, but hangs on to another one for dear life?
Thoughts “feel” true or false because of how well they fit into your existing network of beliefs.
You can tell yourself “I love my job!”…
But if your existing network of beliefs consists of 10,000 reasons, examples, and arguments for why you hate your job….
Then your brain is just going to reject “I love my job!” like a failed organ transplant.
Which brings me to the most important part of building belief in something new:
Do not treat your automatic brain like some idiot that you just need to beat into submission.
Treat it like a trusted friend with whom you are having an ongoing conversation.
Your brain is not a broken vending machine that you need to just keep jamming the same dollar bill into until it finally accepts it.
Your automatic brain is your best and closest friend.
It works literally around the clock to keep you alive and keep you safe. It is constantly making judgments faster than you can blink, and it maintains an extensive mental model of how the world works so that you don’t walk around confused all the time.
So when it throws up a bunch of resistance to changing its mind about something…
Don’t treat it like a dumb summer intern, saying, “Listen, just shut up and do this, it doesn’t matter what YOU think.”
Treat it like a trusted partner and friend. “Hey. You disagree. That’s interesting. What’s your side of the argument? Let’s figure this out together, friend.”
I’ve given you seven ways to have that conversation.
But all of this is just a place to start.
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Epilogue
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