7 Ways to Believe Something New (part 7)
Guys! We’re at the final installment!
So we’ve talked about six different ways to believe something new: (1) put it in your mental filter and find evidence everywhere, (2) find things that are going well and use them as reference points, (3) find the most damning piece of evidence and rewrite the story, (4) break down your brain’s logic chain, (5) reverse the roles, and (6) zip line it.
And now, the final article in this series (and my own personal favorite way of looking at things):
7: Think like your future self
This one is especially helpful when you’ve never done the thing you’re trying to do.
When you’re going after a goal that’s totally out of your comfort zone…
Or when you’re tackling a problem that you’ve never successfully solved in the past…
Your brain will love to insist: “I don’t know” and “This is impossible.”
Both of those are thoughts, not facts.
But dang if they don’t feel really true sometimes.
And you can always “power through it” — just buckle down and do your work while feeling like crap.
But that’s going to require using up a bunch of your energy and willpower.
And why deplete yourself if you don’t have to?
Here’s another way to look at the same situation — to snap yourself out of it rather than just powering through it.
Ask yourself:
How would the version of me that has everything she wants handle this exact situation?
Let’s look at a couple examples.
My goal is to have a multimillion dollar coaching business.
I have never built a business before, and I currently have $0 in revenue.
When I sit down to make a launch plan for my business, my brain says, “We have no idea what we’re doing. We don’t know how to figure this out. This is going to be a spectacular, embarrassing failure.”
Okay. Thank you, brain.
And rather than try to suppress this narrative (“Shut up, brain! Stop saying that!”), or feed myself a platitude I don’t believe (“This is going to be amazing! 😇”), I can ask myself:
How does the version of me that has a multimillion dollar coaching business handle this situation?
What is she like — “successful coaching business Pooja”? She’s already gotten there. She’s confident, calm, open, and self-assured. She has nothing left to prove. She’s just having fun. She knows that everything works out.
How does she approach making a launch plan?
My goal is to weigh less than I weigh today.
I have never weighed that amount, and I have never figured out how to have “balance” with food.
When I’m planning a weekend trip that’s going to involve a lot of eating out, my brain says, “This is an impossible situation. What if I eat salads the whole time, and I’m miserable and everyone thinks I’m weird? What if I fly off the rails and undo all the progress I’ve been making? UGH, why is this so hard?”
Once again, thank you brain, for that incredibly helpful framing.
Let’s ask a better question:
How does the version of me that maintains her goal weight effortlessly handle this situation?
What is she like — “goal weight Pooja”? She definitely eats out, and she doesn’t get stressed about it. She knows how to be flexible and have fun. Unknown situations don’t freak her out, because she knows exactly who she is.
How does she approach a weekend of eating out?
A (hypothetical) client wants to succeed and have fun at her new job.
She has always done well in her career, but she’s never shaken the imposter syndrome.
When she sits down to prepare for a strategy meeting, her brain says, “There are so many unknowns here. We can’t possibly know the right answer. What if we steer this ship in the wrong direction, and everyone figures out that we don’t know what we’re doing?”
She doesn’t have to run away, or whiteknuckle through her prep, or pretend that everything is fine.
She can ask herself:
How does the version of me that crushed this project and got promoted handle this situation?
What is she like — “amazing leader who got promoted” me? She knows that there are always unknowns. She doesn’t walk around pretending she has all the answers. But she also knows exactly how to navigate uncertainty, ask the right questions, and take the next best step even when nobody can agree.
How does she handle prepping for a strategy meeting?
Doing things while your brain is screaming “we don’t know how to do this!” can be hard.
But “I don’t know” is a thought, not a fact.
And “I’ve never done this before” doesn’t have to mean “…and therefore I can’t figure it out.”
You don’t even have to “power through” the uncomfortable feelings your brain is creating.
A lot of us think that things have to be painful until you get good at them.
But “painful” comes from your thinking, not your actions.
And whatever thoughts and feelings you practice while doing something new are the same thoughts and feelings you’re going to have after you get what you want.
Doing something new — going after bold and ambitious goals — doesn’t have to be a scary experience.
You can make it really scary for yourself.
Or you can see the whole thing as an opportunity to practice being exactly the kind of person you want so badly to be.
And you can make the whole experience really, really fun.
Epilogue ➡️
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Epilogue
📸 Instagram | 💌 Newsletter | 👋🏽 New? Start here